Love me some Owen

It has been such a joyful, joy-filled, four months in our home. Life with a baby has been really great, and equally hard- but a beautiful season for sure! Owen is affectionately known around here as our little cub, mr. fun, baby cheese ball, 'O' and Owie-- and we, of course, think he's sooooO cute! The thousands (!) of photos I've taken capturing all His moments of cuteness are becoming overwhelming and probably part of the reason I've not kept up with blogging..Too much life happening to condense into the space of a post.  And yet, I still want to attempt to share some pieces of our current lives, for memory's sake. 

What a transition a little guy can bring! I've experienced exhaustion on a whole new level- where there is never a second to spare- except those moments where time stands still- when I'm staring into the little face that joins Matt and mine so perfectly...or when I'm memorizing his tiny toes... or watching his eye lashes grow...or getting my finger wrapped up in all his itsy bitys fingers while he nurses- there does seem to be endless time for that {at least I allow for there to be}.  Watching my newborn Owen become infant Owen those early weeks was amazing and nothing can compare to bringing a new life into your home and every corner of your heart.

I can't wrap my mind around how Owen is now my 4 month old, every growing, baby boy! It is so fun {and unreal} to watch his constant discovery of the world...and though part of me {will always!} want to keep him swaddled up in my arms as my little baby, we are thrilled to see him hit each new milestone of development. He most recently found his feet and it is the best- constant built-in entertainment! plus he enjoys getting to move more as he rolls from side to side, toes in hand. The yoga pose 'Happy Baby' ...in living color. 

Nothing anyone can say can prepare you for how intimately your baby's well being will affect everything about you. That there will never again be a moment in time that this child won't occupy huge spaces in my thoughts, and though time away from him {something I'm ever so hesitant to take still-makes my heart hurt} may allow for me to close my eyes and relax, I see him still and wonder how he's doing at home while I'm away and if he's crying or needing me. I'm learning, that for me, a 'vacation' away can never truly exist. 

he is always a part of me, and that is wonderful, no matter how tiring.

Being a mother has brought out this instinctual selflessness that constantly seeks to care for, protect, and provide for my tiny human, at any expense- he now comes before my own hunger, health {ouch, my back is a wreck!}, and of course my sleep. 

All this though....this... is love. Like I've never known before. 

 

And if this is love, and this love is only a sliver of the love the Father has for each of us {His children}...that love is unimaginably HUGE and knows no bounds. 

I'm sure at some point a mother told me how becoming a mother would be the hardest and most rewarding thing I'd ever do. I thought I heard those words, and I thought I understood then, but I've lived them now.

And thus begins my journey in seeking God harder than ever-- to fill me up, so that I can pour Life into this little life. I love you, Owen-- I love you FOREVER.